Spying, Gentlemen!

"A bored married couple is surprised to learn that they are both assassins hired by competing agencies to kill each other."

Ah, Mr. and Mrs. Smith. Though not too many people liked it, I'll admit it wasn't too awful bad. Not the taste of a king, but, one makes do with what they are given - such as I and the state of the country... At any rate, a husband and his wife find out they are technically spying on each other, hired by opposing groups. Ironic, isn't it? One could almost say it mirrors a certain king and his son... Or, to be clearer, myself and the boy I inherited from the former king. Find some people to spy on one person, and you'll find they'll just as readily admit they are doing it. Despicable! Though in the movie, the two still seem to get along well, when not trying to kill each other or when their friends aren't trying to kill each other.

I called upon some of Hamlet's oldest friends - why, old enough that they were "being of so young days brought up with him (2.2.11)". Surely friends that grew up with him would be the easiest for him to trust, correct? But of course! Why wouldn't an early friend be someone you'd tell your secrets to, your truths and your woes? The answer? Of course you'd tell them, and with sureness and without hesitation! Thus I asked Rozencrantz and Guildenstern "To draw him on to pleasures, and to gather,/So much as from occasion you may glean,/Whether aught, to us unknown, afflicts him thus,/That, open'd, lies within our remedy. (2.2.15-18)" I truly wish to know what Hamlet has going on in his head, the twisted and warped thing it must be! Poor, dear Ophelia, scared witless by him! Oh, the queerness of youth and sorrows... But as I stated in my previous post, he should be over it by now! It simply isn't healthy, nor suiting of him to mourn for so long and to fall so far! It puts a bad image upon Gertrude and I. And like the wife and husband in the movie, Hamlet and I both seem to be together by ceremony and word, yet against by ideas and plans.

What truly boils my blood, though, is that Hamlet was merely able to get it out of them that they were brought by me to be with him. Can not one of the people under me hold their tongue and keep a secret? Is the only one I can trust now dear Gertrude? After only a small bit of pressing - and babble, if it can even be called that - from my boy, Guildenstern admitted to him, "My lord, we were sent for. (2.2.292)". See? No one can seem to keep what shouldn't be spoken out of the light. Rather like how I suppose the married spies shouldn't have told each other that they were hired to kill one another - failures in following their higher ups. A shame that it must be that way, but t'is the way the world works. Ah, and Hamlet made a jest of it by telling them, "I will tell you why; so shall my anticipation prevent/your discovery, and your secrecy to the king and/queen moult no feather (2.2.293-295)", as if telling them that by saying what they want before they ask will make any difference! Yes, I may know more now, but still... It's under circumstances that Hamlet knows I'm keeping watch. Which is, of course, something that is EXTREMELY bad for me. If he knows, that means he can attempt to fool me or throw me off the track! This will not do, not at all. I want to find some way to raise him up while simultaneously keeping him under control... Ah, and to add insult to injury, the boy also apparently said, "the play's the thing/Wherein I'll catch the conscience of the king (2.2.605-606)". And how would he do this, one would ask? As he has made it, he said he'll find some way to watch my reaction of some sort of... Interruption to the play I have requested. A true bother, really.

Well, it seems I may have been talking on for a bit more than I thought I would have... Nothing that my loyal followers would mind, of course! And with that, fair thee well, Denmark!

Sincerely, 

Your King, Claudius